He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
