yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Randomize
