It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
