I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
