Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I seem to have left my pride at pride
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
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