Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I think we might need a safe word for this...
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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