im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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