Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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