I bet he comes in French.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
