i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
