Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Randomize
