We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
