Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
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