if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
