I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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