Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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