STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize