your room smells of hookers.
And success
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
