I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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