Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
