my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
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