I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
