What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
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