There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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