I wanna passion pit in your ass
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
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