That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
