The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
