1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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