Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
