No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Randomize
