when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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