so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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