I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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