It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
