There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
