How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
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