Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
