Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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