i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
