let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Randomize
