i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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