Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
