And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
