i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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