I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
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