I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
