It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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