my mouth tastes like poor choices
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize