i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
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