just come out here and I will go home with you...
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Randomize
