You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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