if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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